Unsure

I am writing in a state of confusion
This gestation is making me crazy
If knowledge is power then this has been my kryptonite
Mind imprisoned my question, worry, and fear
A Russian Roulette game is being played
Gun aimed at me but my finger is not the one on the trigger
The time is passing so slowly that it feels like eternity
Immortality doesn't feel like much of a privilege right now
Cobra fanged with venom for which there is no cure
Coiled and lying in wait behind one of two doors
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A Risk on "Sunday"

Though not yet mine
You linger in my dreams
From that place of fantasy
I call out to you
With my soul
I reach for yours

You know not of me
But we have seen each other
Our eyes once met
And briefly I felt at ease
A tranquillity swept over me
Have remembered you from my vision while I slept

When I here Sunday
I get a chill because I know what it means
This is a lot to say about someone I have yet to know
But I will be willing to take a risk just to see where it goes
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Etchings in Stone

Write into my skin my truth so I may be silent yet have to world know me
Carved into to my brow my thoughts so over will see clearly what is on my mind
Tattoo my broken heart onto my hand so when it is offered they understand how much there is there to mend
Carve the names of those before by blood or by status: Barbara, Willimena, Robert Lee, Marlene, Herby, Matthew, Harvey, Malcolm, Martin Luther, and Rosa; into my back as a reminder of those who have lived, fought, and died for me to have what I have
Brand onto my soul the name of the one who is meant for me to share it, so when they come I will know of them
Scroll before my eyes my name my hopes and dreams, for the come before and lover or friend and must be protected at all cost
All of this is etched into the stone that is me, hopefully the world won't erode that which has been written
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Confusion of term

Love is not to be take lightly and requires work
Lust is fun and frivolous and distracts from to task at hand

Love will make you heart race in good times and bad
Lust give you the rush just until....oh my god....yes...yes AHHH, and it's done!

Love will teach you things you never knew or thought you where capable of
Lust puts you in situations and place that you know you shouldn't be in

Love, real true love, transcends distance, sickness, disease, gender, religion, and just about all else in the world as long as it is pure
Lust is so reliant of "equipment" that it only crosses superficial boundary set by choice and desire

Love can turn a cold rainy night into a romantic diner for two
Lust will make event the simplest task like walking down the block turn into reason for a police report

Obviously, very similar concepts, but the kicker is when you find that love that get you deep in your soul it stay forever. Lust, well just wait for someone else to walk by!
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The unseen key

Write on my skin the words that define who i am so the world can see me as i am so i will nothing have to speak and so that i can not hide.
Make the text bold so they will have no choice but to face who and what i am in the depths of my soul

Brand my heart with fire fueled by the passion to achieve my hopes and dream; Let it course through me to te ends of my fingers and the tips of my toes.
It burns the doubt from within me and lights the way to my truth

Bind iron to my bone so i can stand upright as the man i am meant to be in the world and push through all obstacles before me
My weapon agianst hate, ignorance, and those who defy true humanity

Born a storm in my mind; Divine inspiration that glows from beyond my dark eyes guiding you into my soul and the depths of my spirit
Given to me not out of lust but through the connection that binds us deeper than the ocean currents that bind the seven sea.

And to all of the treasure that i hold mind body heart and soul you are the key. One fate and god willing you will be revealed to me.

Transformation

The turning of a quarter of a century, I have seen a transformation in my self. I have resisted the temptation to revert to bad habits and old ways. It has not been a chance in who i am as a person, but more of a evolution in my character. My lust for blinded justice has been tempered with reason. My need to save the world has been challenged by my need to first save my self. I have started to see the balance between practicality and morality, and I am comfortable knowing the difference. I have learned to harness the force of nature that i am rather than let it run wild. I have found peace in my solitude so that i will be prepare when i am ready to share myself with some one else. I no longer fight the turmoil in my self because it is what shows me i am human and alive. I no longer seek out the dramatic, but when I come I try to direct it rather than be on the chorus line in the show. I see my self more as the man I want to be rather than the man i am becoming though I have a long way to go. I have learned you can be a Diva without being a B*$@h all the time. I have learn that that not every one wants advice (good bad or indifferent) and it should only be dispensed with it is asked for. And finally, as most of you know i am a comic and fantasy nerd so this will make sense, I have realized that when you have an immense talent, there is a time and a place for it to be use and a time to hold it make. Not every situation is a battle, a competition, or a struggle that needs to be take down with ferocity. Like Jean Grey, Storm, and Spider-Man who put it the best "With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility" . The greatest power we have is being alive, thus making our lives as individuals our greatest responsibility!

Spiritual knot

A broken halo and tattered wings

My voice is gone so I can not sing

All my blessing twisted all becoming a curse

My only refuges are words and verse

Restore my grace that celestial glow

That energy I had to walk in a room and have it always show

To carry my head higher than the sun

Let this knot in my soul be undone